I never really cried as a young man. However, with every passing year and every breath taken, I know more painfully the enormity of the waste. Seventeen years ago, we landed in Afghanistan. Then Iraq. It is 19 years since I joined the Marine Corps. I joined at 19. Twenty veterans or more commit suicide every day, or so they say. I never really knew why I was angry, but I was. I was lucky. For some, the rage takes hold and destroys their heart. Others simply bury it and move on. Some have no outlet for it, and some have no idea what to do with it.
Why was I so angry? You ask yourself this question every day. It doesn't seem to have any reason. It's just there, irrational and implacable. Only now can I begin to fathom the depths of human psychology to begin an attempt at an answer.
War is an injustice. No matter what the reason, or how just you believe it to be, war is unjust. A normal human reaction to injustice is rage. The insidiousness of war is that no one is ever guilty. Well, we are. You spend a lot of time apologizing, as a veteran. You apologize to each other for not listening. For not paying attention. For mistakes made and lives lost. For innocent carnage and dead children — you apologize for it all. You apologize to loved ones for how you are; you apologize to people you've hurt. A guilt for all the injustice of war. We send our young to die without ever really asking what right do any of us have to do so? These questions are left to the perpetrators and survivors of these acts.
On top of the burden of survival, we also carry that burden of guilt and rage, quietly. Nobody talks about it. Nobody really wants to hear about it. Just come home, be successful. Thank you for your service. Yet as these operations continue to drag, as contingency spirals into contingency, as conflict breeds conflict, this burden grows heavier. Silently, slowly, inevitably, the burden takes its toll.
As we look at our country today, we are confronted with many harsh truths. We are hollowing out. We are at each others' throats. Conspiracy thinking and irrational anger dominate our politics. Under it all these damnable wars keep festering, corroding our nation, bankrupting our children and grandchildren, splitting us further apart and driving our veterans to suicide. The one thing a sovereign nation cannot do is the one thing this nation must. We must carry this burden together. This nation will carry this burden openly, or it will continue to suffer the corrosive effects of problems we don't talk about. This Memorial Day, if you can find it within yourself, feel a little less thankful, and a little more guilty.
It isn't too much to ask.
Philip Sturm, Minneapolis
ELDER CARE
If it's truly done well in the majority of settings, show data
In a May 23 commentary ("Most elder care is good, and helpful improvements can't be rushed"), Josh Berg asserted that most assisted-living and nursing-home settings across Minnesota treat their residents like family and provide a caring environment. We should challenge Mr. Berg to provide the data and methodology he is using for such a claim.
I am at the stage of my life where I am visiting more and more assisted-living facilities and nursing homes to see friends and family. My experience has been more like JacLynn Herron's experience, described in a commentary published the same day as Berg's ("Legislature's inaction triggers nursing home flashbacks"). If the situation is as Berg claims, we should be provided with the data that back it up. His article is devoid of any factual basis for his claims.